Learning through Experience

When Darling Daddy and I bought our current home, the only things we were really thinking about were the location, namely its proximity to both of our places of employment at the time, and its price tag. We wanted to find a place that neither of us would have a long commute and a place that would provide me with the opportunity to sty home with our future children, if we were lucky enough to have any. 

Well, that whole commute plan worked out real well for a year. Yep, one year. Actually less than that. We moved in at the end of May one year and I was writing a letter requesting a year leave of absence just 12 months later. Things happened fast for us. Good thing we had taken the price tag into consideration too. That allowed me to take a full year off from teaching to test out the waters as full time mom and making the finances work. We were able to see that it would work for us long term, which was a good thing since I got pregnant again the following May. May is a happening month for us.

So there I was the following May, just 3 years after moving in to our home, now with a 2 year old and a 3 month old. Life was a cake walk. Ok, that's a lie. Life was anything but that. I had the headstrong and assertive terrible two's of Curly Girl constantly battling me and I was functioning on less than desirable and broken sleep thanks to the terrible sleeper that Ginger Boy was. Life was not easy in those days. There were tears from all 3 of us on many a day back then. I knew we'd get through those difficult days (and obviously we have), but there was always one question that went through my head. Why didn't we decide to live closer to our own parents?

Why wasn't that one of the things we thought of as we bought a house? Sure, it came up a few times, but we could never find anything too reasonable or that we really liked. And commute time was something we were both pretty firm about, so getting much closer to either set of parents wasn't really possible. Where we live now we are one hour from my parents and a little over an hour and a half from Darling Daddy's. It's not the worst thing and we're lucky that we are as close as we are because we know there are others who are much further apart, but it is something that would be so nice.

I often imagine what it would be like to just be able to ask a parent if they could come over and watch the kids for a couple hours on a weeknight so we could go out to dinner alone, just the two of us. Or if they could just come by, or me drop the kids off with them so I could go to the dentist or doctor by myself. Or have someone watch the kids so I could go grocery shopping by myself. Or just to have the ability to have people close by to watch the kids so we could get projects done around the house [like the basement project we've had going for over a year...]

Basically, I wish we had thought about these things before having kids. But how could we have known? You don't know until you're there, learning through experience. Before having kids you don't realize that the bi-monthly haircuts you get will become an absolute luxury [I'm currently going on 10 months...] Or the ability to go out for a run by yourself at any time of day that you please would be a novelty. Or that a trip to Grandma's house would have to become a full day trip because of naps and mealtimes.

If you live close to your kids' grandparents, consider yourself lucky! And if you have their help on a regular basis, even luckier. Use and take the help! Do it for those of us that wish we could have it! The help that we do get from our parents is so valuable to us! We would love to have more of it. But for now, we're continuing to live where we are, so we will just have to continue to cherish the visits and time we get with them as frequent or infrequent as they may happen to be. We know that this is where God has placed us in life right now, and we'll continue to follow His plan.

Thanks to Erica Cole Photography for capturing this one!